Silver Handle,
Next, what happened to my gold? After precipitating my Ap with SMB as directed and testing both precipitate and solution, my gold is now gone. WTH? Should I simply treat the entire batch as waste without bothering to siphon?
Testing the solution (please explain your method)
Testing the precipitate. (Can you tell me how you are doing this?)
Give us some details of what you did to get to where you are now. Then maybe we can give better advice.
How much materials and what type, what acids or reagents, how they used, heat, and even details you think are not important may be.
Look these are very easy processes and if you are having trouble with these, then you would really have problems with nitric and aqua regia (a whole nother ball game).
Do not toss anything.
Looks like you are fairly new to this, do not get frustrated, cement your solution onto copper, and test your solution for values, treat the solution by reading dealing with wastes.
Tell your wife you have the gold and will get it into a form she will like but it takes time she needs to learn patience, as you do, (patience is one lesson will learn from refining).
Now get back to reading Hokes book, doing the chemical experiments she suggested, reading the forum, and studying, until you know where you went wrong and how to correct it, you understand how to run the process you choose know how and why it works, and how to fix things if it does not.
If you do not follow this advice I am afraid you will always be wondering where you lost all of that gold, until you do wise up and study.
Patience you will be melting beautiful buttons soon enough, but you must learn to walk before running.
Also spend time gathering materials you need (do not spend much money, until you are positive you need it (there is no free method, second hand store alternative, or you cannot build or make your own), do not use high grade materials to learn to do the process, or else you should expect high grade losses.
Welcome to the forum, I could hold your hand through some process, but you would not learn to do it without me holding your hand, you need the education and understanding to stand on yer own two feet and know what to do next in any circumstance you run into.
I hope you understand and this helps.