# My Pride and Joy! (the birth of my first child)



## floppy (Jun 28, 2011)

Well anyone who has been following my thread (The AP Game) found out I was expecting my first born. And it happened Sat. night June 26 at 8:42p.m.
She was a healthy 7.5lbs and 19 inches long. Her birth was the most amazing and beautiful event I have ever witnessed in my life. I knew it would be special, but I could have never imagined how it would really feel. For those of you that have been through it know exactly what I'm talking about, for those of you whom haven't I hope you will be blessed to experience someday. It truly is a life changing experience. Well I think I could go on and on about this so I'll get on with this. I would like to thank this forum for being such wonderful people to share life with. Not only for the knowledge to refine gold and other pm's but for the opinions on life and your experiences. I really am thankful for finding this site not only for the ability to refine the gold I was after but also for the people that I now consider friends of mine that I can talk to anytime. I hope you feel that I am now a friend of yours you can talk to. So from me and your newest member of the forum have a wonderful evening. Thank you for taking time to read my feelings Kenny.

I can't believe I forgot her name, Samantha Lynn Sheppard


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## seawolf (Jun 28, 2011)

Hey Kenny, I remember my first. I was not home at the time, Tonkin Gulf Yacht Club. When I was informed that I had a daughter the same information was missing. What is her name? Can you post a picture of the family? Good luck and we wish you all the best.
Mark & Jolene


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## Claudie (Jun 28, 2011)

Congratulations! :lol:


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## meng2k7 (Jun 28, 2011)

hi,

we are happy for you Floppy!

congratulations. :lol:


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## Palladium (Jun 28, 2011)

Congratulations !!!


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## glondor (Jun 28, 2011)

Congratulations!


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## Anonymous (Jun 28, 2011)

Awesome! I hope everybody is healthy and doing great? Someday I'll tell you about my 16.


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## wrecker45 (Jun 28, 2011)

congratulations. you are now a wealthy man.


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## Sodbuster (Jun 29, 2011)

Well Congratulations to proud Poppa on the birth of your first little bundle of joy.
You must be glowing real big right now. When she says DaDa for the first time you will glow all over again, it doesn't stop.

Now you know Samantha Lynn (such a pretty name) will be needing a little brother too.

Ray

PS: I mite need a cigar


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## nickvc (Jun 29, 2011)

Congratulations and wishing all of you well.

Your going to need this forum even more now :shock: :lol:


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## stihl88 (Jun 29, 2011)

Well congratulations Floppy!

I'm expecting my first on the 8th of September and can't wait to experience what you have.

Good luck mate and it's always good to hear when they are in good health and that's a good weight also.


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## jaythenutz (Jun 29, 2011)

Congratulations, I feel your all the way it is what i would call true LOVE. even the fourth one got me all teary eyed. you baby had the same specs as my newest baby girl one month old now. /// that is a perfect birth size. best of luck enjoy don't think about the teen years yet have fun lol
~*~Jay~*~


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## Harold_V (Jun 30, 2011)

jaythenutz said:


> don't think about the teen years yet have fun lol



Yep! Words of wisdom, as some can attest. 

I have but one child (assuming she's mine), born to my first marriage. A daughter. When she turned 14, sex, drugs, tobacco and alcohol became her choice. She told me, at age 15, that she no longer needed me in her life. She is now 48 years old and has never returned. 

Having children doesn't always turn out so great! (Yes, I realize my case is extraordinary). 

Harold


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## nickvc (Jun 30, 2011)

Sorry Harold but your not alone, I have two boys who I haven't seen in 7 years....amazing what a good vicious divorce can cause!
But on the brighter side most folks have a good relationship with their kids and live to see them grow and prosper, may all those members who have kids or expecting them be on that path.


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## 4metals (Jun 30, 2011)

Raising kids is hard work, harder than making .9999 gold! It takes a lot of tweaking and nudging but sometimes (at least in my case) it works out well. I have 2 married kids, a son and a daughter and to this day I am still very close to them and their spouses, it makes the time put in well worth it. 

I know in this day and age it is getting harder to do this but it is important for them to know when they are growing up that family comes first. Remember, saying it and teaching it by example are 2 different things. Like I said it isn't easy but it is well worth it.


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## Anonymous (Jun 30, 2011)

We are the exception to the rule.......
Our kids have been homeschooled there whole life,and we are blessed enough to be in an occupation that allowed all of us to be together 24 hours a day.Our kids have worked very hard(physically and mentally) their whole life.That is the way my wife and I were raised,and we insisted on raising our children in the same manner.Our oldest daughter filled a very large box with booties,mittens,and beanies for children(that she hand made herself),and shipped them to the Childrens ward at the cancer/burn unit of St.Judes hospital.
Yes there are children that go astray,and it hurts me deeply to hear those stories.I have known Harold for a long time and am aware of his situation with his daughter.It's not fair and it's not right.I have many "dad's" on this forum,and Harold was the first.His rulings toward me,and my actions, hurt,but I know how he really feels about me,and he is only doing it because he cares,and he is trying to steer me away from areas I do not need to be.
I have to go lay back down(I hurt myself yet again),but I had to give my 2 cents on this.
I can only hope that everyone has the opportunity to experience what we have,with our children.


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## Harold_V (Jun 30, 2011)

4metals said:


> Raising kids is hard work, harder than making .9999 gold! It takes a lot of tweaking and nudging but sometimes (at least in my case) it works out well. I have 2 married kids, a son and a daughter and to this day I am still very close to them and their spouses, it makes the time put in well worth it.


I agree, and I'm green with envy. 

One of the truths in life is you can't make people like you. If they have a mindset such that your hopes and desires are in conflict with their thoughts, no amount of cajoling will change the relationship. What one hopes for is that the children share the same value system, which I've found to be the case with my mate. She and I think much alike, so we get along very well. It's clear to me, know, that my ex had some differences in her reasoning---which have obviously been assumed by the child that was born. 

Nick, sorry to hear you, too, have the same difficulties. Perhaps, with some luck, as time passes, they'll see things differently. I had that hope with Suzie (the child), but time has only strengthened her resolve. I can safely assume that I will never have a speaking relationship with her. Even her getting married and having a child made no difference. 

What troubles me the most is that I have no one to whom to pass on my cherished possessions. Susan, my wife, was not able to bear children, so we have no heirs. Some yet to be chosen entity will benefit greatly. 

Harold


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## Anonymous (Jun 30, 2011)

(Raises hands in the air)
:idea: You know Mary and I,love you and susan dearly......hint hint!And you know how much we love the house......hint hint! lol


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## stihl88 (Jun 30, 2011)

Lol Mic... 

If you haven't kept in touch with your daughter Harold you might have some Grand Children that you don't know about and if you did i could guarantee they would want to see you.


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## nickvc (Jun 30, 2011)

> What troubles me the most is that I have no one to whom to pass on my cherished possessions. Susan, my wife, was not able to bear children, so we have no heirs. Some yet to be chosen entity will benefit greatly.
> 
> Harold




Give your goods and money to whom you and your good lady both decide deserve it Harold.
I really can understand why some of the richest people in this world give it all to charity..it's all on loan, houses, cars, gold, it's worth nothing without happiness... 8)


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## Harold_V (Jul 1, 2011)

stihl88 said:


> If you haven't kept in touch with your daughter Harold you might have some Grand Children that you don't know about and if you did i could guarantee they would want to see you.


Interestingly, the fellow she married has done his best to get us together. When the child was born, a boy, he called a few months later and wanted to know if he could come to our place to introduce the child to his (assumed) grandfather. As you may know, we live in Washington State, and they, at the time, lived in Colorado. 

Needless to say, I was pleased! I told him that Suzie was welcome as well. She came along, but had nothing to say. They were here for three days. I have heard nothing from her, but last Christmas we received a card from the son-in-law and the child. I responded with a letter, thanking them for thinking of us and offered the same relationship they sought. Dead silence. It is clear that she prefers to have me out of her life, even at the expense of denying the child the right to know his grandfather. Sort of helps you understand the type of person she has become. 

The boy is now seven years old. They live in New York State. 

To help you understand the mindset of this person (the assumed daughter), she has eliminated me from her life in every way possible. I was not invited to any of her activites as a young person, and certainly was not advised of her marriage, which came when she was about 40 years old. Both Susan and I had expected that she would see a different side of life when she became a mother, but that hasn't happened. 

In order to preserve what little is left of my sanity, I have written her off. I expect nothing, therefore I am not dissapointed. It was very troubling to hope she was calling when the phone rang. After 20 years, it became apparent that was not going to happen. 

This child was one of the most beautiful you could ask for. She was a shear pleasure until she grew up. I'll never know what triggered her response, at least from all indications, so I remain clueless. Some children are even sexually offended and still love their parents----but this child appears to resent my having tried to keep her from harm when she was too young to make decisions. I have not discounted the possibility that her mother has played a role in her demeanor. 

Life goes on! It must. 

Harold


For clarity, the daughter is named Lisa Susan, and goes by Suzie.

My present wife (married for 34 years now), who was not instrumental in my divorce, is named Susan Gay. I call her Susan. It can get a little confusing with two gals named Susan. 

Note that I made reference to me being the child's *assumed* grandfather. It's possible I am not. That was part of the reason I got divorced. My ex spent virtually the entire 14 years of our marriage in bed with at least two guys. Could be more. I have no way of knowing. She admitted to the two.


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## stihl88 (Jul 1, 2011)

I really don't know what to say except for now I understand. It sounds like you've tried your best and as you said, you have to save your sanity.
Fortunately my wife and i come from good sized family and were all pretty close, especially with her side as they are a little more family orientated than mine, her being half Greek
and the other half Italian things can get pretty large when it comes to her family events. 

I'm Rambling now...


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## joem (Jul 1, 2011)

Hurray! A new refiner/scrapper is born.
congratulations


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## Claudie (Jul 1, 2011)

joem said:


> Hurray! A new refiner/scrapper is born.
> congratulations




I think you probably scrap & refine in your sleep.... :lol:


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## butcher (Jul 2, 2011)

Kenny, 
congradulations.

my babys are in their 30's, and I still remember the day they were born.
they are the best parts of my life.


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## floppy (Jul 2, 2011)

Thank you all so much for the the thoughts. It means alot. This thread seems to have taken quite a different route than I had ever intended. So to the few of you that I have brought up bad memories for, I am truly sorry. I cannot imagine the situations that some of you have been through. It is a shame that things like that can happen. I have zero experience in that perspective so all I can say is that my thoughts are with you. Have a good night. Kenny


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## Harold_V (Jul 3, 2011)

Kenny,
For me, it's resolved itself as being the way it is. There are some things in life we can't control. While I'm not happy with the end result, I live with it without issue, aside from wondering what the problem is. 

I am in hopes that none of my disclosures have a negative effect on you. Children can be one of the finest and proudest moments of one's life. They can also be the source of endless sorrow. Remember---you can lead them to water, but you can't make them drink. All you can do is show them the way you hope they pursue. 

Hold them close, and show them they are loved. With a little luck, they get past the teen years, when they know *everything*, and become wonderful human beings. 

Best regards,

Harold


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## Oz (Jul 3, 2011)

floppy said:


> Thank you all so much for the thoughts. It means a lot. This thread seems to have taken quite a different route than I had ever intended. So to the few of you that I have brought up bad memories for, I am truly sorry.


Forget it, revel in your new child! No matter how things turn out, no man has a future without children. Think about that for a minute, then read my closing comments.



Harold_V said:


> While I'm not happy with the end result, I live with it without issue, aside from wondering what the problem is.


That is what would get me. Call me an assh_le, but tell me why. I may disagree with you, but at least I understand where you are coming from. I can agree to disagree with my own child, or anyone else for that matter. 

For the record, I have no biological children of my own. I have however raised 2 sets of them that had missing fathers. A long term girlfriend with 3 children the first time round, and then 4 children with a second girlfriend. 

Some have done well, some have not yet. I am generally in peace about it no matter the outcomes, because I feel I did the right thing by them when no other man would including their own boilogical fathers. Yes, it can still hurt.

It brings to mind a comment my father had made to me many years ago when in hindsight he felt he may have been in error on some of my rearing. As a father you do the best you can to ensure a viable future for your children no matter the cost emotionally or financial. However he was rather disappointed that neither my brother nor I came with an operator’s manual when we were born. So all he could do was try the adjustment screws hoping to see a smooth idle and what would work for the best.


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## nickvc (Jul 3, 2011)

As a final comment from me on this subject all I can say is although I seem at present to have lost my kids, I have an adopted daughter and tens of adopted nieces and nephews all of whom have adopted me?
As the old saying says what goes around comes around and if in life you learn to give rather than take you should end your days surrounded by people who care not because they have to but because they actually do!
Enjoy your children and make them feel special because as Oz so succinctly said they are our legacy!


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## Lambskin (Jul 12, 2011)

Hey, I am a little late but congratulations! My wife and I had our fourth child 17 months ago. Enjoy every moment they grow up fast. 

Best wishes, 
Ken


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## glondor (Jul 13, 2011)

Harold, Some people get conflicted over issues either real or imagined, and are never able to get clear of the issue. Perhaps this is the case with your daughter. It really is a thin line between love and hate, so if there is still emotion on her part, there is still hope. In either case a well set up trust fund with lots of performance hoops and conditions administered by a trustworthy executor or executrix could be a worth while consideration on your part for your grandson. Just a few thoughts...


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